[ Hey, Chuuya, you know how you haven't heard from Dazai much because he's been coming home really late and leaving really early and the only signs that he's slowly dying are the flower petals and blood-soaked tissues in the trash can and Dazai's innate stubborn refusal to actually confront his own mortality?
Anyway, there's a message left for Chuuya, when Dazai feels like he might actually be dying. Dazai's voice is a bit raspy, and the message is just a voice message -- it sounds a bit dire, actually, but Dazai speaks with his normal, careful, bored intonation. ]
I didn't leave the mafia because of you. I left because Mori-san weighed his options and decided the Mafia's gifted permit was worth more than the life of one of three people I cared about, and then I lost the second one, and I didn't want to stick around to lose the third. [ Dazai does not, explicitly, state who this is, because he's being honest but not that much. The message temporarily breaks off -- Dazai is having a coughing fit -- before it resumes. ]
I blew up your car so you wouldn't follow me and so Mori-san couldn't try and say you'd been in on it at all. Which, in fairness, you weren't, but I couldn't trust that he wouldn't decide getting me back was worth more than you, and you were always more loyal, anyway. [ So Dazai wasn't going to make Chuuya choose between him and the Port Mafia, or Mori, or whatever. ]
Anyway, everything I've heard here says that when you die you'll come back, just a bit more traumatized than before, so keep looking after Atsushi-kun for me. [ A beat, and then: ] Partner.
[ It's a bit superfluous to bother telling Chuuya any of these truths when Dazai is still going to die, but it means that the pain of hacking up petals dies down enough that Dazai can strategize more appropriately on how he's going to actually die. ]
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voice; un: bandages (cw: implied suicide) [1/2]
Anyway, there's a message left for Chuuya, when Dazai feels like he might actually be dying. Dazai's voice is a bit raspy, and the message is just a voice message -- it sounds a bit dire, actually, but Dazai speaks with his normal, careful, bored intonation. ]
I didn't leave the mafia because of you. I left because Mori-san weighed his options and decided the Mafia's gifted permit was worth more than the life of one of three people I cared about, and then I lost the second one, and I didn't want to stick around to lose the third. [ Dazai does not, explicitly, state who this is, because he's being honest but not that much. The message temporarily breaks off -- Dazai is having a coughing fit -- before it resumes. ]
I blew up your car so you wouldn't follow me and so Mori-san couldn't try and say you'd been in on it at all. Which, in fairness, you weren't, but I couldn't trust that he wouldn't decide getting me back was worth more than you, and you were always more loyal, anyway. [ So Dazai wasn't going to make Chuuya choose between him and the Port Mafia, or Mori, or whatever. ]
Anyway, everything I've heard here says that when you die you'll come back, just a bit more traumatized than before, so keep looking after Atsushi-kun for me. [ A beat, and then: ] Partner.
[ It's a bit superfluous to bother telling Chuuya any of these truths when Dazai is still going to die, but it means that the pain of hacking up petals dies down enough that Dazai can strategize more appropriately on how he's going to actually die. ]
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video; un: bandages [1/2]
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